The Fires of Rebellion Have Burned Out for Now
I have been silent for a long while and with good reason—rebellion is never an easy road to travel, and I’ve been walking on it for a while. This year has brought much change to my life. As the year began, I found a renewed interest in the Word and stepped out and took a risk at the urge of the Spirit and began blogging about what I was reading and what God was working out in me. A short six weeks later, He placed a new call on my family’s life, and I don’t for one minute believe that it was incidental that the call came at a time when I felt the power of the Spirit moving strongly in my life.
As a believer, Christ has called me to take up my cross daily and follow Him. Christ struggled under the cross He carried to Golgotha, but for some reason, I expected mine to be a lot easier to bear. Change is never easy, and I didn’t expect that this change would be, but it became overwhelming for me when my focus shifted from the call to the difficulty of carrying out that call. As a result, when my cross began to feel heavy and I became tired and weary of waiting for change, I let these circumstances change my perspective, and suddenly I found myself too burdened and weary to bear the call any more—thus, my rebellion ensued. May I say that rebellion (for a child of God who knows His word) is not really that much fun? It is really exhausting work to maintain a willful, angry distance from God because of discontentment with life’s circumstances. Just one case in point—I know He’s sovereign, so how do I continue to question what He is working out in me through the things He places in my life and the call He gives? Needless to say, I’ve given up the ghost of rebellion (with the help of brothers and sisters in the faith who interceded for me faithfully when I didn’t even want to), and with God’s urging, I’ve quit basking in the non-existent glow of it--for now anyway…as I’m not arrogant enough to assume that I’ll never struggle again in this matter much less any other one that comes my way. I do have more faith in Him than I had this time last year, and I pray that He will use my struggles to encourage you in yours.
As a believer, Christ has called me to take up my cross daily and follow Him. Christ struggled under the cross He carried to Golgotha, but for some reason, I expected mine to be a lot easier to bear. Change is never easy, and I didn’t expect that this change would be, but it became overwhelming for me when my focus shifted from the call to the difficulty of carrying out that call. As a result, when my cross began to feel heavy and I became tired and weary of waiting for change, I let these circumstances change my perspective, and suddenly I found myself too burdened and weary to bear the call any more—thus, my rebellion ensued. May I say that rebellion (for a child of God who knows His word) is not really that much fun? It is really exhausting work to maintain a willful, angry distance from God because of discontentment with life’s circumstances. Just one case in point—I know He’s sovereign, so how do I continue to question what He is working out in me through the things He places in my life and the call He gives? Needless to say, I’ve given up the ghost of rebellion (with the help of brothers and sisters in the faith who interceded for me faithfully when I didn’t even want to), and with God’s urging, I’ve quit basking in the non-existent glow of it--for now anyway…as I’m not arrogant enough to assume that I’ll never struggle again in this matter much less any other one that comes my way. I do have more faith in Him than I had this time last year, and I pray that He will use my struggles to encourage you in yours.
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