An Uncertain Affinity (2 Cor. 4:7-11; Gen. 3:16)

Today in my devotion time, I came across a word that led me to another word. Can I say that this is my usual, lifelong problem in reading dictionary entries . . . I have a hard time stopping.  It’s a real problem. ☺

The word connected to the word I was looking up about the tabernacle was skeuos. In the Greek, this word carries the meaning “of uncertain affinity; a vessel, implement, equipment or apparatus (literal or figurative [specifically a wife as contributing to the usefulness of the husband]):--goods, sail, stuff, vessel.”

I got caught immediately in the first part: “uncertain affinity.”  Uncertain means “not able to be relied on; not known or definite.” Affinity means “a spontaneous or natural liking or sympathy for someone or something.” Putting these two words together is something of an oxymoron, which in the Greek literally means “pointedly foolish” because of its seeming contradiction. How in the world can you have an affinity for something you don’t know? How can it be spontaneous and a natural liking if it is uncertain? Hmmm.

I looked at the next part, which dealt with both literal and figurative uses. Most of the verses related to this word in the New Testament convey the meaning through the word vessel, which can be a literal object or something figurative, like the reference to a wife. In the definition, the context is the wife being useful to the husband. Notice I said useful to (as in helpmate), not “used by” in a derogatory sense. There is a difference. The world would have women believe that subjecting themselves to their husbands in marriage (submitting in a godly fashion to a husband and coming alongside them to help their work) is demeaning, but this is not true, not in a marriage with God at the center, which is the whole point.

USEFUL “TOOLS”
Think about it. How many times in a day do you use a tool to help you accomplish your work? My day-to-day work is teaching, and I have many things that I couldn’t do my job without in today’s classroom: a computer, iPads, books, a projector, good old pencil and paper, etc. . . I “use” these things not in an evil, harsh, dominating way; rather, I use them to accomplish something good—teaching students about the English language and reading and comprehension and enjoyment. These tools are not abused. I care for my equipment. Protect it. Value it. Put it to good use. Likewise, women in Christian marriages who are valued by their husbands are not only protected, but also useful to help the husband accomplish the work God intended for him, which reflects the rest of the definition I discovered.

I thought it was interesting in the Strong’s entry below for 4632 that the verses attached to this word commend the care of the woman as the weaker “vessel.” Think about this: a vessel is a hollowed out or concave object meant to hold something. What gets poured into us will eventually get poured back out of the container. [Ugh! This is the toothpaste tube being squeezed analogy that gets me every time.] If what is being poured in is the love of a godly husband nurturing his wife and the love of the God of the universe who sent His only son to die for her, how can she not be a useful vessel full of overflowing love?  Look at the middle part of the Strong’s entry below for 4632:



Notice that it commends to husbands “the obligations of kindness towards their wives (for the weaker the vessels, the greater must be the care lest they be broken).”  When operating in our own power, we humans tend to be frail and can easily be broken in both body and spirit. We must take care inside our marriages (both husbands and wives) to nurture and cherish them lest they lose their usefulness after being cracked or even shattered and discarded.

LESSONS FROM THE KITCHEN
I couldn’t help but think of my ceramic dishes and lessons learned in my kitchen during my 27 years of marriage so far. When a ceramic dish is very hot and something is poured into it that is very cold, it “shocks” the dish, and the dish usually cracks, rendering it useless—something to be discarded. Women in general are nourishers and are meant to love and care for the ones placed in our care as God has directed; as a result of the way we were created, we tend to open ourselves to risk more easily and feel hurts more readily. When treated with coldness, we can shatter emotionally, making us vessels without much use in contributing to our marriages or our husbands’ effectiveness. We tend to react to what is poured into us, thus the term vessels becomes very appropriate.

The good news is that God wants to pour Himself into us. If our pot is cracked, He repairs it and fills it. Jesus left us with the comforter, the Holy Spirit, when He finished His work on earth and sat down at the right hand of the Father where He lives to intercede for us. Jesus is our treasure, and if we are filled with Him, we will be soft to the work He would have us do, both in our marriages and in our lives in general. Not only that, we will also be vessels that won’t crack when the cares of this world try to enter in. We have the comforter with us. We have the Word to guide us. We have all we need for life and godliness.

One of the uses of the word skeuos is found below in 2 Corinthians 4:7-11:

But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh.

There is much hope and encouragement in these verses!

ONE LAST THOUGHT
One last thought I can’t escape, and then I promise I will quit for the day. Back to the idea of “uncertain affinity.” After looking at all of this, it makes me think of Genesis 3:16, often read as the curse on women, which reads as follows:

        To the woman He said,
         “I will greatly multiply Your pain in childbirth,
         In pain you will bring forth children;
         Yet your desire will be for your husband,
         And he will rule over you.”

I don't see this as a curse, but I do believe women naturally desire their husbands. I would say that I do have a desire for my husband’s authority and leadership that at the same time repels me. I have an “uncertain affinity” so to speak. While I want his guidance and protection, I ALSO want to do my own thing, which falls far from the realm of submitting.

I am a sinner. I live inside this fleshly body while I try at the same time to subdue its yearnings and live by the spirit that is at war within it. Honestly, I thought I’d have this conquered years ago, but being a vessel used by God, submitted to His authority, submitted to my husband’s authority over me (a natural order of marriage and God’s design) is hard, and now I don’t think the battle will be over until I die and get to go to heaven; yet I catch glimpses of what it should be, and I want more (until my flesh takes over again). I get it but I don't. I understand but I don’t. It’s an “uncertain affinity” for sure! God help my husband!

Comments

  1. Great read and very informative Thank you! �� �� �� �� �� �� I commend you on your honesty and very sensitive insight I'll add on!

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  2. Well the uncertain affinity is also a translation of malakos. This is in the New Testament and is something that has been used to describe a catamite. A submissive male homosexual. Both sodomites (dominant male homosexuals) and catamites (submissive male homosexuals) have been condemned making mention of both because in some cultures dominant male homosexuality is not considered homosexual. Only female homosexuality has been condemned with both people involved being condemned under one statement because the same cultural distinction didn't apply to women. Lesbians were considered homosexuals both of them, by culture. Paul mentioned both so neither could say they were ok. It can also mean someone who gives off an appearance that makes people unsure of their sexuality. I have to say your submissiveness to God and to your husband is absolutely beautiful. I get that, though, that his authority is both attractive and repellant. Its love that doesn't always feel good. As a former submissive male homosexual myself, before converting to Christianity, I understand the attractiveness of your husband's strength and authority as well as a desire to just do what you want to do. A man being a man is exceedingly attractive. Though I still struggle with all that I haven't been with a man since my conversion and many who know said they would never have been able to tell had they not known. I hope this will allow for further study of the Word of God. Its been a great blessing to me and made my life so much better and easier since I started obeying God.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for commenting, and your insight into the other meanings of the words is welcome. Living as God prescribes is a challenge for all of us in a that we are sinners in a fallen world. However, our struggles are different, our challenges varied. I am praying for you as you continue your walk with Christ. It sounds as if you are grounding yourself in the Word of God. Hang on tight and keep pressing “on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Ph. 3:14). May we all be so transparent with our own sins in the encouragement of others. God bless you!

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    2. I appreciate that. Ive long since thought that being guarded with what we've done and what we struggle with is a hindrance to those who need to know they aren't the only ones who need Gods recurring forgiveness. Openess and love is the key to a strong congregation and strength in the Lords Church.

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  3. God bless you and your home.
    I understand some of what you are saying. Their is accountability to God towards my wife and how I make decisions.
    My wife accidentally called me lord as Sara did Abraham. It humbled me, not because she called me lord rather because she did it on accident. Great Read.
    Prepare yourselves. A storm is coming
    Blessings.

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  4. Thank you for this study of the word "uncertain affinity" - I am studying the word "seek" in the Bible and came across, Matthew 6:33 "seek and you will find" and seek in Greek is: zēteō (Key) and Strong's definition is: verb, Of uncertain affinity - and i was stumped!! haha, googling each word like this doesn't make sense...I came across your blog post and it helped so much to understand! Thank you!!

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    1. I totally understand getting lost in word study--it's a lifelong problem I have. A recent reading through of the Bible in the Amplified version provided me with this repeated definition of seek that you might be challenged by as much as I am: a longing to be in His presence; requiring Him, longing for Him as essential to life, even as a vital necessity.

      I am glad the Lord used this post to help. Keep digging into the word and drawing nearer to the God who gave it to us. God bless! :)

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  5. "Of uncertain affinity" is not actually part of the definition of the word. Rather, it is a "comment" or "remark" that is related to the language use of the word and its similarity to other words.

    A great many - if not most - of the words in the dictionary have these types of comments/remarks attached to them. (And usually listed first, before the definition begins.)

    The phrase essentially means:

    "The kinship of this word to other words is unknown." ("at least not with certainty")

    It simply means that [Strong] could not connect the word (with certainty) to some other more original word or to a "lower-level" [root] word.

    Hope this helps

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    1. Thank you for clarifying that! It is interesting that God can use even my broken understanding of something like the definition of a word I look up to bring glory to Himself. He is good always, and I always pray that anything I have done in error inadvertently, He will always cover with His grace as people read what I have written. Also, I find that as I grow in Him and learn more about Him, I see more of what I have written that could have been so much more. I will look at definitions a bit differently now that you have offered this comment, and I will continue to trust Him to keep me from writing anything that would bring harm. Thank you for taking the time to read my blog and offer feedback. :)

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