The things they took

Today my two youngest children drove away from home in a caravan of three vehicles packed with their belongings. It’s not as if they went very far—just thirty minutes down the road. It’s not as if I won’t see them, but they aren’t here now. I will no longer wait up to know that all are safe within my walls (or abdicate that late-night task to my husband, the night owl of the family). All my babies have grown up and flown the nest. (Well, maybe these last two were pushed, but they’re gone.)

They took their beds—the many-times painted iron bed that I inherited when I moved away from home and came to Auburn. Daddy sanded and spray-painted that bed mauve; it was the color at the time and I loved it, but now seeing the same color kind of makes me sick because I still remember how much of that pink color existed in my bedroom. The queen sleigh bed we couldn’t afford to buy but that I was so excited to buy to replace the full-sized iron bed went, too.

They took the high-backed oak bar stools my mama gave me that I remember sitting on as a teenager. I really didn’t need them, but I love the memories attached. They took the microwave that my oldest almost caught on fire one night when he forgot to add water to what he was cooking. They took the toaster—my daughter loves bagels. I donated my Keurig to them. I will live, and maybe my middle child will, too, when my daughter drinks her coffee in the mornings—Starbucks might be a treat now that she’s adulting—and the good Lord knows she isn’t a morning person.

They are coming back to take my childhood bedroom suit, no longer the sunny yellow color of my youth, but now a bold blue and white. One will be used as a dresser, the other a TV stand in the living room.

They took some of the pantry—a “free” shopping trip—and I easily replaced each bit of it today at Wal-Mart (except for Morton’s Nature’s Seasoning, which I can never find). They took the mop, the laundry detergent and fabric booster, the trash bags, and the cleaning supplies; my hope is that they’ll actually use them!

They took the couch my mama bought not long after I married Greg. After we inherited it, we dubbed it the nap couch, and we had to go by and visit it this afternoon. I feel quite sure the trip wasn’t at all about making mama feel better about either how to find her babies or how to cope with her now suddenly empty nest.

The funny thing is, I’ve been waiting for this day for a while. I’ve known it was coming, joked about it, dreamt about the freedom of having my husband to myself once again for the first time in 25 years, of no one making or leaving messes for me to clean. I truly thought I was ready, but maybe three days’ notice wasn’t quite enough for this mama’s heart.

Maybe there were a few emotional, hormonal tears shed. This I will neither confirm nor deny.

The point is this: stuff can be replaced, but time with your little ones cannot be. Make the most of the time with your precious babies while they are little. To soon they are grown and gone.

Teach them to love Jesus, to love each other, to take responsibility early because one day they will leave, and their sphere of influence will change and your time in that sphere will be mere muscle memory in their spirits. Teach them to play, to read, to dream by doing those things with them. Love them well and raise them up to leave you, hopefully well prepared for a full life that entirely revolves around Jesus.

The thing is, their lives may revolve around other things when they leave. At that point, keep praying. Keep loving them. Be available. (Did I mention pray a lot?)

The things my youngest two took with them today were more than the tangible things needed to set up their new apartment. They carried my heart, and hopefully all they learned in this household. My prayer is that God will bless them and keep them and remind them who and whose they are as they begin this journey at a different address. My prayer is that they will grow and serve as God desires. 

My prayer is that I will do the same as I take the time to reflect.