Random Thoughts after almost a Week of Quarantine

I saw a cow this morning with her head stuck through a barbed wire fence chewing her way through the tasty blackberry brambles on the other side. It was gross, like most things cows do--the strands hanging loosely from her drool mouth. The things cows will do to get to what’s on the other side never cease to amaze me. The reality is that while the bushes appear to be quite tasty to the cows, the protein content is usually lesser than the grass they have in pasture (barring drought). Hmmm. Sound familiar?

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I finished the top of an oversized king quilt for my bed this week while we were waiting on Greg's test results. Got Corona? If anyone hasn’t noticed, life goes on while one is in quarantine or sick. Family gathers, and one misses it. Friends lose loved ones, and one cannot be involved as desired. Church services happen, and one cannot attend live (just virtual). Community projects occur, and one cannot participate. Quarantine in a lot of ways is a temporary suspension of life, and it is frustrating, 

BUT God. 

He showed out this week in the body of the church in this place.

All the things listed above happened to us this week while we were waiting, yet no projects went unfinished; instead, members of the body stepped in and made even our small part in the process move right along, and God was glorified. Greg was able to broadcast his sermon live Sunday morning, and although it wasn’t the same as being together, the message went forth, and God was glorified. After a few more days of quarantine, we were able to leave the house and love on our friends who suddenly lost their son this week, but but before we were able to do so plenty of people stepped in and ministered where we weren’t able, and God was glorified. Quarantine ended yesterday, and my daughter arrives today for a brief working visit, and I will be able to see her before she begins teaching in a town over two hours away, and God will be glorified in a visit that will be shorter than anticipated. In all this God has been good and He has been glorified, and He would’ve been good had we remained in quarantine two or even three more weeks. We are thankful to be free. (BTW, it was pneumonia, not COVID-19; either way, God is still good!)

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Now, back to the quilt thing. As I sat in a room far from my husband’s noisy thoughts (yes, thoughts can be noisy, too) as he worked while in quarantine this week, I pondered the underside of my quilt. It’s messy (at least all my projects, whether cross-stitching or quilting, are) and only gives the barest glimpse of what’s on the other side, its colors muted and distorted by the distraction of seams and strings. It’s not pretty, but I didn’t expect it to be. 

The other side, however, should look like it is supposed to look—polished, put together, finished, neat, vibrant, attractive, NOT distracting in its finished state. Hmmm. It sounds a little familiar, too. One of my favorite poems is by Corrie ten Boom and is called “Life Is But a Weaving,”  maybe you know it?

My life is but a weaving 

Between my God and me.

I cannot choose the colors

He wealth steadily.

Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow;

And I in foolish pride

Forget He sees the upper 

And I the underside.

Not ’til the loom is silent

And the shuttles cease to fly

Will God unroll the canvas

And reveal the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful 

In the weaver’s skillful hand

As the threads of gold and silver

In the pattern He has planned.

He knows, He loves, He cares;

Nothing this truth can dim.

He gives the very best to those 

Who leave the choice to Him.

I can’t help but think of my friend currently walking through this valley of the shadow of death. It is beyond hard, and she knows she has to do it, but she doesn’t want to, and no one blames her; we are a little fearful of the valley of the shadow of death if truth be told; God knows this too. She knows God will sustain her, but it certainly doesn’t feel like it in the moments of grief that wash over her. She can’t see the finished picture--none us of can--but she is a quilter, too, and knows that the underside never reveals the glory of the finished top. But this is hard. Living is hard. Discipleship is costly. Our savior paid a tremendous price to redeem us and the devil doesn’t like it. Our flesh pulls at us while we are still here and we long to go, yet it is needful we stay and let God finish His weaving. 

By the way, my quilt is not a work of perfection on the top side either. It has many flaws. Not all the corners match up like they should. Not all the colors complement each other perfectly. But it is mine and is reflective of what I am learning about quilting and about life. It will keep me warm and make my husband feel loved (because did I mention it is super-sized?). And it will serve its decorative purpose also and remind me of this time in quarantine when I struggled with being contained in the same house with another human being who didn’t want to be contained. A time when I, like the cow I saw this morning, wanted something other than what it was given at the time. It will remind me not so much of how little God needs me to accomplish anything as much as how He uses the entire body together to accomplish His purpose in everything and still manage to bring Himself glory at all times in all things in ways I could never imagine. All that using broken people and messy undersides!